Graduation Speech by Mickey Steinberg - 2012
Evie, Thank you very much.
When Evie asked me to speak tonight, I explained to her that I was very reluctant to do so because I have no celebrity status, and if any of the graduates were aware of me at all, it was simply as one of the old men who attends services at Beth Jacob. I was convinced that the graduates would have no idea whether or not I knew what I was talking about since they did not know me or my background.
During our conversation, Evie asked me if I would feel better about it if I spent some time with the graduates so we could get to know each other. I jumped at the idea, so a few weeks ago, Paul Oberman was kind enough to arrange for me to have pizza with the class where we could talk and become acquainted with each other. What I really wanted was to see if I could learn what to talk about, as I did not have a clue.
I learned much about the class and they are a very impressive group of young adults as you have learned this evening. For me, the exchange was a wonderful experience; they learned about my background and career and I learned about their accomplishments and plans. It was really a very exciting hour.
They were interested in the progression of my career and the fact that it has been a fairly consistent moving from one position to another, and often from one industry to another. I was asked if I would relate to them some of what I have learned from my unusual career. Unfortunately, the time had run out, so I told them that we would pick up the conversation here tonight and I would address this request.
I am addressing the graduates who have the benefit of our discussion. If my comments seem disjointed to the rest of you, just remember that I am talking directly to them - so I ask your indulgence. If you disagree with my conclusions, then please wait until we are outside to throw tomatoes.
You graduates will soon realize that tonight is one of those events that are truly life changing for you and your life will never be the same. You will all soon be leaving home to start a new life where you will not have your extended family constantly there to advise, plan and do for you, and you will either become more self-reliant or very unhappy. When you leave here tonight, you are starting on the great life adventure that will at times be fun, challenging, frustrating, rewarding, and every other adjective you can imagine. The only adjectives I can guarantee are accurate are that it will be different and constantly changing.
The most important truth that I have learned is that life is serendipitous which means to accidently come upon something that is fortuitous. A teacher, a book, an experience, a school course, or whatever, may ignite your interest in something that you had never considered or even knew existed. However, it may be something that would be of more interest than that which you are pursuing at the time.
Most of you have little understanding as to the almost limitless types of careers that are available to all of us. Fortunate people love their chosen careers so much that they cannot conceive of doing anything else. I have found that many people will accidently discover an idea or concept that will spark their imagination such that they may be happier pursuing another dream. People, who are risk takers, will often pursue other careers that truly excite them. I have found that the true risk takers are often the most successful and the happiest people in their work.
By risk, I am not talking just about economic risk. I am talking about the risk of facing the unknown and possible failure. For example, look at the risk taken by the Kollel Rabbis when they came to Atlanta to start a teaching outreach in a southern town a long way from their homes and way of life. They were pioneers and true risk takers and I believe that they succeeded beyond everyone’s imagination, including their own.
It was not really what they were trained for, but just consider the impact that they have had on this community. You have to admire them, and I am confident that they have been very happy fulfilling the goals that they set for themselves.
I worked in an architectural firm and we had one architect who was always on the phone, drinking coffee, goofing off and doing anything except preparing construction drawings as he should have been doing. You know what? We kept him on the payroll anyway, because he was unique. He was the only member of the firm who made no mistakes – you know why? - he never did anything.
I have learned that people, who pursue their work diligently, will make mistakes. Those who go to extreme lengths to avoid mistakes will either be painfully slow, do nothing that is original and will never be leaders. I have also learned that, as a rule, the first person to realize that a mistake has been made is the person who made it.
When you make a mistake, there are two things that you should do.. First, as soon as you are aware of it, admit it and develop a proposed correction. If you try to hide it, then ultimately it will be found and the fix will be much costlier than if you had attacked it earlier. The second thing you should do is learn from it and try never to repeat it. I have made more mistakes than you can imagine. However, I have learned as much, if not more, from my mistakes than from my successes.
You are now young adults and you are going to have to start making personal decisions and arrange much of your daily lives for yourselves. I have learned that when faced with a decision, you have the obvious choices, but there is always that other choice - the choice to delay making the decision. If you choose to delay your decision, time will then force the decision for you, and a time-forced decision is usually the worst of all choices. If you allow this, you may never get over the “if I had only’ s” or the “what if’s”.
I have learned that it is essential for you to believe in yourself as Emerson wrote so eloquently. This does not mean that you should be arrogant, but once you have gathered the necessary facts and arrived at a well-considered conclusion, then you should act. You should erase all self-doubt, believe in yourself and pursue your decision with great self-confidence. Lack of self-confidence is quickly detected by others, and will lead to doubt by them in your ability to deliver on a promise.
Most projects and programs today are accomplished through team effort. I have learned that if you want to achieve team-success, don’t worry about who gets the credit. Get the job done, and the truth is that everyone involved knows who the real contributors are. Disputes over who gets the credit will lead to failure as resentment within the team festers and members of the team try to discredit each other at the expense of the product.
During our discussion, the graduates were curious about my Jewish background, and I would like to expand on my answer for everyone. I explained that I grew up in Augusta, GA and I had a very different Jewish education than they have had. My education started during the depression and the community could not afford Jewish day schools. Our parents were well aware that Jewish education was the most important factor in maintaining Judaism into the future, so they did the best that they could.
If a determined family could afford it, and were willing to send their boys away for extended periods of time, they sent them to a Baltimore yeshiva, but I only knew of a few who chose this option. No girls who were sent. For whatever their reason, my parents did not consider sending my brothers or me off to a yeshiva.
We attended an orthodox Shul, but we went to Hebrew School only a few hours a week and we learned to read only enough Hebrew to participate in the services and to recite the Maftir and Haftorah for our Bar Mitzvah. We studied Tanach for an hour or so a week on Sundays, but it was very superficial. We were not able to study Talmud because there were no English translations and we could not translate Hebrew.
As you can tell, in spite of the Jewish community’s best efforts, we had very little Jewish education and we were just short of being illiterate. Most important was that our parents instilled within us the glory and obligations of Judaism, and we were proud to be Jews. Throughout my life, I have gone out of my way to make sure that no matter what the circumstances, people know I am Jewish. At times, I have been accused of being a Jewish chauvinist.
The South and Augusta had a different culture before and during World War II than now. The Augusta Jewish community was virtually isolated. I knew of no Jewish bankers or Jewish CEO’s of non-Jewish owned companies. To the best of my knowledge, there were no Jewish lawyers, accountants or architects in large firms, so those professionals practiced alone, or in small partnerships. Most young Jews entered their family’s business.
There were small Jewish quotas for admissions to many colleges and universities including the Medical College of Georgia located in Augusta. The Emory Dental College had an anti-Jewish student policy that prevailed into the 1950’s that was Draconian. Dr. Perry Brickman has created a good DVD that deals with this travesty. There were neighborhoods, clubs and hotels that did not admit Jews into the early 1970’s. My family and I were denied access to the Cloisters on Sea Island in 1973.
Throughout grammar school, there were three Jewish boys in my class, and at no time was I invited to a class social function. My first week in high school, a big guy beat the dickens out of me as he taught me that Jews sat in the back of the class. The teacher just stood there and watched all this and did nothing. I learned how to retaliate in such a way that after that, a student thought twice before trying to teach me anything in that manner.
Anti-Semitism in the South began to wane after World War II as the world was stunned with the knowledge of the Holocaust followed by the creation and success of Israel and the emergence of the Civil Rights Movement. The restrictions on Jews began to lessen and the opportunities began to increase until we have reached the point that we are at today. Through the centuries, Jews have lived under forced restrictions and quotas, and like our ancestors, we not only survived, but we flourished. Now, for reasons with which we are all familiar, world-wide anti-Semitism is on the rise.
You graduates are the recipients of an outstanding secular education and a wonderful Jewish education. You are well equipped to compete within the secular society in which we live, while remaining a knowledgeable and devoted Jew. You also have the Jewish education that will allow you to pursue a career in religion if you so choose.
You should not take this gift for granted. You need to thank Hashem for the generations of lay leaders and Rabbis who created Yeshiva Atlanta years ago and who had the determination and courage to purchase this building and to provide the leadership and governance that have allowed Yeshiva Atlanta to operate through some very challenging times.
You need to thank the dedicated staff and teachers for having the knowledge and determination to provide an outstanding academic program. Most important, you need to thank your parents and family who set their economic priorities that allowed you to attend Yeshiva Atlanta and supported you both physically and spiritually through these years.
I want to congratulate you and all the people who have been responsible for getting you to this graduation. It is wonderful. All of us here are proud of you and the school, and you should be proud of yourselves. I also want to welcome you to the struggle that has been going on for centuries to maintain Judaism and our commitment to fulfill our obligation to and love of Hashem. It is very encouraging to have young adults of your caliber and dedication, join the fray. This reinforces my confidence that we, the Jewish people, will continue not only to survive, but to flourish for centuries to come.
May Hashem bless all of you with good health, happiness and success in all you undertake in the future. Mazel Tov!
When Evie asked me to speak tonight, I explained to her that I was very reluctant to do so because I have no celebrity status, and if any of the graduates were aware of me at all, it was simply as one of the old men who attends services at Beth Jacob. I was convinced that the graduates would have no idea whether or not I knew what I was talking about since they did not know me or my background.
During our conversation, Evie asked me if I would feel better about it if I spent some time with the graduates so we could get to know each other. I jumped at the idea, so a few weeks ago, Paul Oberman was kind enough to arrange for me to have pizza with the class where we could talk and become acquainted with each other. What I really wanted was to see if I could learn what to talk about, as I did not have a clue.
I learned much about the class and they are a very impressive group of young adults as you have learned this evening. For me, the exchange was a wonderful experience; they learned about my background and career and I learned about their accomplishments and plans. It was really a very exciting hour.
They were interested in the progression of my career and the fact that it has been a fairly consistent moving from one position to another, and often from one industry to another. I was asked if I would relate to them some of what I have learned from my unusual career. Unfortunately, the time had run out, so I told them that we would pick up the conversation here tonight and I would address this request.
I am addressing the graduates who have the benefit of our discussion. If my comments seem disjointed to the rest of you, just remember that I am talking directly to them - so I ask your indulgence. If you disagree with my conclusions, then please wait until we are outside to throw tomatoes.
You graduates will soon realize that tonight is one of those events that are truly life changing for you and your life will never be the same. You will all soon be leaving home to start a new life where you will not have your extended family constantly there to advise, plan and do for you, and you will either become more self-reliant or very unhappy. When you leave here tonight, you are starting on the great life adventure that will at times be fun, challenging, frustrating, rewarding, and every other adjective you can imagine. The only adjectives I can guarantee are accurate are that it will be different and constantly changing.
The most important truth that I have learned is that life is serendipitous which means to accidently come upon something that is fortuitous. A teacher, a book, an experience, a school course, or whatever, may ignite your interest in something that you had never considered or even knew existed. However, it may be something that would be of more interest than that which you are pursuing at the time.
Most of you have little understanding as to the almost limitless types of careers that are available to all of us. Fortunate people love their chosen careers so much that they cannot conceive of doing anything else. I have found that many people will accidently discover an idea or concept that will spark their imagination such that they may be happier pursuing another dream. People, who are risk takers, will often pursue other careers that truly excite them. I have found that the true risk takers are often the most successful and the happiest people in their work.
By risk, I am not talking just about economic risk. I am talking about the risk of facing the unknown and possible failure. For example, look at the risk taken by the Kollel Rabbis when they came to Atlanta to start a teaching outreach in a southern town a long way from their homes and way of life. They were pioneers and true risk takers and I believe that they succeeded beyond everyone’s imagination, including their own.
It was not really what they were trained for, but just consider the impact that they have had on this community. You have to admire them, and I am confident that they have been very happy fulfilling the goals that they set for themselves.
I worked in an architectural firm and we had one architect who was always on the phone, drinking coffee, goofing off and doing anything except preparing construction drawings as he should have been doing. You know what? We kept him on the payroll anyway, because he was unique. He was the only member of the firm who made no mistakes – you know why? - he never did anything.
I have learned that people, who pursue their work diligently, will make mistakes. Those who go to extreme lengths to avoid mistakes will either be painfully slow, do nothing that is original and will never be leaders. I have also learned that, as a rule, the first person to realize that a mistake has been made is the person who made it.
When you make a mistake, there are two things that you should do.. First, as soon as you are aware of it, admit it and develop a proposed correction. If you try to hide it, then ultimately it will be found and the fix will be much costlier than if you had attacked it earlier. The second thing you should do is learn from it and try never to repeat it. I have made more mistakes than you can imagine. However, I have learned as much, if not more, from my mistakes than from my successes.
You are now young adults and you are going to have to start making personal decisions and arrange much of your daily lives for yourselves. I have learned that when faced with a decision, you have the obvious choices, but there is always that other choice - the choice to delay making the decision. If you choose to delay your decision, time will then force the decision for you, and a time-forced decision is usually the worst of all choices. If you allow this, you may never get over the “if I had only’ s” or the “what if’s”.
I have learned that it is essential for you to believe in yourself as Emerson wrote so eloquently. This does not mean that you should be arrogant, but once you have gathered the necessary facts and arrived at a well-considered conclusion, then you should act. You should erase all self-doubt, believe in yourself and pursue your decision with great self-confidence. Lack of self-confidence is quickly detected by others, and will lead to doubt by them in your ability to deliver on a promise.
Most projects and programs today are accomplished through team effort. I have learned that if you want to achieve team-success, don’t worry about who gets the credit. Get the job done, and the truth is that everyone involved knows who the real contributors are. Disputes over who gets the credit will lead to failure as resentment within the team festers and members of the team try to discredit each other at the expense of the product.
During our discussion, the graduates were curious about my Jewish background, and I would like to expand on my answer for everyone. I explained that I grew up in Augusta, GA and I had a very different Jewish education than they have had. My education started during the depression and the community could not afford Jewish day schools. Our parents were well aware that Jewish education was the most important factor in maintaining Judaism into the future, so they did the best that they could.
If a determined family could afford it, and were willing to send their boys away for extended periods of time, they sent them to a Baltimore yeshiva, but I only knew of a few who chose this option. No girls who were sent. For whatever their reason, my parents did not consider sending my brothers or me off to a yeshiva.
We attended an orthodox Shul, but we went to Hebrew School only a few hours a week and we learned to read only enough Hebrew to participate in the services and to recite the Maftir and Haftorah for our Bar Mitzvah. We studied Tanach for an hour or so a week on Sundays, but it was very superficial. We were not able to study Talmud because there were no English translations and we could not translate Hebrew.
As you can tell, in spite of the Jewish community’s best efforts, we had very little Jewish education and we were just short of being illiterate. Most important was that our parents instilled within us the glory and obligations of Judaism, and we were proud to be Jews. Throughout my life, I have gone out of my way to make sure that no matter what the circumstances, people know I am Jewish. At times, I have been accused of being a Jewish chauvinist.
The South and Augusta had a different culture before and during World War II than now. The Augusta Jewish community was virtually isolated. I knew of no Jewish bankers or Jewish CEO’s of non-Jewish owned companies. To the best of my knowledge, there were no Jewish lawyers, accountants or architects in large firms, so those professionals practiced alone, or in small partnerships. Most young Jews entered their family’s business.
There were small Jewish quotas for admissions to many colleges and universities including the Medical College of Georgia located in Augusta. The Emory Dental College had an anti-Jewish student policy that prevailed into the 1950’s that was Draconian. Dr. Perry Brickman has created a good DVD that deals with this travesty. There were neighborhoods, clubs and hotels that did not admit Jews into the early 1970’s. My family and I were denied access to the Cloisters on Sea Island in 1973.
Throughout grammar school, there were three Jewish boys in my class, and at no time was I invited to a class social function. My first week in high school, a big guy beat the dickens out of me as he taught me that Jews sat in the back of the class. The teacher just stood there and watched all this and did nothing. I learned how to retaliate in such a way that after that, a student thought twice before trying to teach me anything in that manner.
Anti-Semitism in the South began to wane after World War II as the world was stunned with the knowledge of the Holocaust followed by the creation and success of Israel and the emergence of the Civil Rights Movement. The restrictions on Jews began to lessen and the opportunities began to increase until we have reached the point that we are at today. Through the centuries, Jews have lived under forced restrictions and quotas, and like our ancestors, we not only survived, but we flourished. Now, for reasons with which we are all familiar, world-wide anti-Semitism is on the rise.
You graduates are the recipients of an outstanding secular education and a wonderful Jewish education. You are well equipped to compete within the secular society in which we live, while remaining a knowledgeable and devoted Jew. You also have the Jewish education that will allow you to pursue a career in religion if you so choose.
You should not take this gift for granted. You need to thank Hashem for the generations of lay leaders and Rabbis who created Yeshiva Atlanta years ago and who had the determination and courage to purchase this building and to provide the leadership and governance that have allowed Yeshiva Atlanta to operate through some very challenging times.
You need to thank the dedicated staff and teachers for having the knowledge and determination to provide an outstanding academic program. Most important, you need to thank your parents and family who set their economic priorities that allowed you to attend Yeshiva Atlanta and supported you both physically and spiritually through these years.
I want to congratulate you and all the people who have been responsible for getting you to this graduation. It is wonderful. All of us here are proud of you and the school, and you should be proud of yourselves. I also want to welcome you to the struggle that has been going on for centuries to maintain Judaism and our commitment to fulfill our obligation to and love of Hashem. It is very encouraging to have young adults of your caliber and dedication, join the fray. This reinforces my confidence that we, the Jewish people, will continue not only to survive, but to flourish for centuries to come.
May Hashem bless all of you with good health, happiness and success in all you undertake in the future. Mazel Tov!
